Hey guys! I am so excited to be posting a non-introductory post (yes I used ‘post’ twice but I don’t care). I don’t know what I am more excited about, the wine that I’m currently drinking or getting all these random thoughts out of my head. I’m still trying to decide the direction I want to take all of this so you guys will have to bear with me as I explore my inner monologue.
Today’s wine tasting is of the red variety. *Insert Vanna White showing of the bottle here* It’s a drier, full bodied wine, something I would say is almost semi-sweet. My first thoughts were how buttery and smooth it was and how nicely it paired with the quinoa stuffed peppers I made for dinner. (If I have already lost you on the terminology check out this site for helpful descriptions.) I made my mom try it too since it was from her fridge and all but she was not impressed. For those of you, like my mother, just testing the waters of the wine world, I wouldn’t recommend this being a first choice. If you are like most newbies the sweeter, more softer tasting wines are easier for your palette to get used to.
*If you can’t read the label it’s called Convento San Fransico, Ribera Del Duero, 2011 Robel
My Overall Rating: ♦♦♦
It was good but not something I will probably be remembering for years to come.
What I liked most about it was that it wasn’t overbearing. I had it before, during, and after our meal and not once did I reach for something else to quench my thirst. The longer I let it breath the more the flavors came out (check out aeration); it became more spicy and truer to the description on the bottle. I planned telling you guys a little more about the company and type of wine this is but I found the website not be very clear, so instead of spouting of misinformation I’ll give you guys the link and let you discover it using your own understanding – The Winebow Group.
Now just a heads up for you guys: I had written another draft of this post last night. After over two and a half hours my Safari decided to quit on me and I lost everything. Being that I was exhausted and my wine glow was gone I shut my computer and angrily went to bed. I woke up feeling defeated and upset knowing full well that it was not the end of the world. So I let myself cool off and decided that what I had previously written wasn’t what God intended for me to share.
My original plan was to talk about how a job shouldn’t define you and how we should stop judging others for their occupation, because seriously, stereotypes really needs to stop. I have been feeling so much pressure to decide a career path or make a 5 year plan that it’s stopped me from accomplishing anything. Instead I’ve been in a vegetative state thinking,
“Maybe if I ignore it, it will just figure itself out.”
Wrong. If anything it has caused me even more issues thinking about all the time that has passed while I’ve laid dormant. People keep telling my that I “can’t be a waitress the rest of my life” and I am “running out of time”; while simultaneously saying I have all the time in the world. (FYI I’m not even a waitress at the moment and I am a bomb waitress thank you very much). Who are they to say what I can and can’t do, if that was my passion and they loved me they should support me no matter what stereotype it includes.
But then I realized something. The problem isn’t what others think of me because of my job. It’s what I have started to think about me. I’ve allowed all these feelings about myself to be projected off of those around me. Twisting it all into a tornado of doubt,
I have been living in fear.
Job-centered fear. I preach up and down how you don’t need to follow the ‘american standards’ for what makes you a successful person. That isn’t my journey. (If it’s yours then YAY for you, seriously, I wish I could just find my passion and work on it instead of spinning in circles.) Yet I still have allowed the norm to haunt me for some weird reason.
After getting my general degree, literally an Associates of General Studies because I couldn’t even pick between arts and sciences, I just felt defeated. I didn’t feel anymore successful or accomplished. Instead I just felt like I wasted 6 (yes 6) years of my life only to have a stupid piece of paper and a mountain of debt to show for it. Yes, I know education is important and that adding this diploma to my resume will help me find more job opportunities but it still leaves me feeling empty. Am I the only one here who doesn’t have a clue what they want to do and is kind of okay with that? I mean really, most of the time I am completely content knowing that I may always be doing something different without any form of a career path in sight. Is that wrong? Is this something I can figure out or is it something someone will one day say to me that changes my mind? Why do I allow the questions of “What do you do?” to cause me so much anxiety.
The more I think about this the more I realize these are the wrong questions. I should be asking, “What amazing adventures is God going to take me on?” or “How will this develop me into a better person”. Our focus should be on bettering ourselves not on how valuable society sees us. I have to remind myself to be careful though because this isn’t about looking inward to see what I can do to become more Insta-famous or get a bunch of friends on Facebook. It’s about looking inside to see what God is telling my heart and where he is trying to guide me. I used to think of myself as a good listener but there is always room for improvement.
So starting now I am intentionally making the choice to concentrate on how God views me, not social media or my next boss. I will stop comparing myself to those who have filled out the ‘american checklist’: completing college the first 4 years after high school, getting a stable career to pay off student debt, and then getting engaged working towards happily ever after. I will accept that this is where I am and where God intends me to be. I will be patient and listen closely for his instructions because
“We know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love him and are called according to his purpose for them” -Romans 8:28
What I believe to be true in my life is how he is totally and completely in charge and the more I lose sight of that the more lost and discouraged I become. Thank you guys for taking time out of your day to take a step into the inner thoughts of my mind. I know this isn’t the most methodical post but it wasn’t meant to be. I hope my words invoke questions and thoughts. I want to know if you agree or disagree. If you guys would be so kind as to share your journeys with me I think we could all learn something. I created this blog to reach everyone on a deeper level and connect in ways that sometimes seem hard when you’re always crunched for time and only see each other in passing. So sit back and have a glass of wine with me.
Hugs & Kittens,